Friday, February 17, 2006: Insanity is fun!

I bring you salutations and news: February 28th is "Spay Day USA." The ads for it go something like this:

Spay or neuter your children-

It helps them live longer lives

They will have fewer behavioral problems

Orphanages and families spend thousands of dollars on unwanted children

Do it for love-

Unaltered children are more likely to run off

An unaltered female can theoretically produce 9 children in a single gestation

An unaltered male can theoretically produce 78840 offspring in a single year

Or maybe it was pets. I don't know, it makes about as much sense either way. And I love how they use the word "unaltered." I usually use "intact" for unsterilised and or uncircumcised (don't get me started on that...).

But at any rate, any salutation is incmplete without a little bit of abuse. So it's time for English lesson number two! Today's lesson: the word "Celtic." Say this word aloud. How did you pronounce that initial "C"? If you pronounced it like the c in "crop," then find one of those elementary school star stickers and put it on your tongue. If you pronounced it like the "c" in "cinema," punch yourself in the teeth. Then point out this article to whoever you heard that pronunciation from. If you pronounced it like the "C" in Cnidaria, then I don't know what to do with you. It always amazes me that people say they got a "Seltic" cross, yet they don't say that they got it as a "jift." But, that's just my personal irritance. Good bye for now.